Hey friends! It’s Cathryn Buse of Mama Bear Apologetics, a partner of Ratio Christi International. Mama Bear apologetics exists for the sole purpose of equipping moms to answer the tough questions of the faith. These questions start in the home and moms are usually the first ones to hear them. So ladies let’s educate ourselves so we can be effective witnesses to the world and to our children. You can follow Mama Bear Apologetics on the web, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube and iTunes.
Today’s topic will focus on how we use apologetics in the home. We are living in a time where society is increasingly skeptical of religion in general and Christianity in particular. This is why it is so important to know how to give a defense of your faith. However, it’s important not just for our own faith, but for the faith of our children. Proverbs 22:6 says to “train up a child in the ways of the Lord.” I love the use of the word “train” because it gives the appropriate image of how we are to approach raising our children in the faith. Just like in athletics or the military, training is something done consistently; it is intentional and purposeful. A soldier doesn’t stumble into being fit for battle anymore than an athlete practicing every once in a while is ready for competition. In those scenarios we understand that to be successful, training means consistency – preparing on a regular basis, and being intentional – doing all things with that end in mind. Likewise, in leading our children in their faith we must train consistently and intentionally so they are adequately prepared for the battleground of skepticism they will face.
So how do we do that?
1. Be intentional: Specifically teach our children how to defend their faith
As Christian parents, we seem to understand that raising children in the ways of the Lord will include teaching Bible stories and scripture memorization – which is most definitely part of it. But we have to recognize that the moment we start teaching them the Bible is the moment we have to be prepared to also teach them why the Bible. So apologetics, that defense of how and why we know the Bible is truth, must be a normal part of our Bible teachings with our children. This will look differently depending on the age of your children. With older children, you should set aside days specifically teach apologetics. Bring up the question of God existence and walk through several different types of arguments for how we know that God does exist. Or discuss why Christianity is truth and other world religions are not, and show them how that can logically and intelligently be answered. Go through a defense from common questions that skeptics have. There are so many resources that you can use to guide you through this, including my own book called, Teaching Others to Defend Christianity which can be found on Amazon.com.
With younger children, you can always work in the concepts of apologetics by bringing up pointed questions during your normal Bible study time. For example you could say, “We’ve said the Bible is God’s Word, how do we know that?” And get them thinking on why they are trusting the scriptures as truth – and not just because the Bible says it is true but how we can know that explicitly. You can guide the conversation with some simple evidences from archeology or the confirmation of Old Testament prophecy that prove God’s omniscience.
Maybe you’re studying how God spoke to Abraham and get them to consider how Abraham knew God was real. You might be discussing current events and bring up the existence of God even in a world of evil and suffering. You might be studying the Gospels and include extra-Biblical first century writings that corroborate the Gospel accounts. Any of those topics can and should be combined with our Biblical studies with our children. You don’t have to give them every possible objection to Christianity and dive into the depths of philosophy, you are just laying the groundwork to show them this is truth, and not just because mommy and daddy say it is.
I also think a lot of the apologetic groundwork can be laid in how we teach the Bible itself. If we always teach Bible stories as disjointed cute little accounts scattered throughout this big book, it seems no different than when we pull out the giant book of fairytales and read to them about Little Red Riding Hood. They too have fantastical accounts of a hero, sometimes animals that talk, and a moral to the story. But the Bible is SO much more than that – so we should teach it that way. Now, there’s nothing wrong with teaching individual Bible stories, but we must at some point show them the overarching big story of what God was doing throughout Scripture and throughout history. If we never make it real to them where the Bible is comprised of real events happening in a real place and time to real people, then no wonder they have such a hard time believing it to be truth when they get older!
For example, one day I was reading to my 6-year-old son about the prophecy given by God to Abraham that though he would have numerous descendants, they would be enslaved in a foreign land for 400 years. I asked him if he knew how that happened. At that point I was able to show him the lineage of Abraham down to Joseph, then he could recall that story of Joseph being sold as a slave. I could explain how Joseph ended up in Egypt, where he could recall the story of Joseph revealing the dreams to Pharaoh. Then I could walk show him how the rest of Joseph’s family came to live in Egypt and multiplied as a people by the blessing of God. I told him how that made the next Pharaoh so afraid that he made the Israelites his slaves. Now I could show him what God did by raising up Moses, where he could recall those stories of Moses leading the Israelites out of Egypt and walking on dry ground through the Red Sea.
Now all of these disjointed Bible stories could come to life for him as the recorded accounts of real people living in a real time being used by the living God to accomplish His will. They were no longer unconnected cute little stories shared at Sunday school. Now he could start to see them in a timeline in relation to one another and with God’s hand at work in all of them.
However, in order to change how we’re teaching the Bible, we must know it ourselves. We cannot teach to our children what we do not know ourselves. As parents, we must truly study the Bible ourselves to teach the Bible in context. We also must have a solid understanding of why the Bible is truth and how we can have confidence in Christianity as truth. So the first step is to be studied in the Bible so that you can be intentional in your teachings about it as the inerrant word of God.
The second step is to be studied in the foundation of apologetics – so you can intertwine that into what you are already teaching daily and you can set aside specific times in your teaching to address apologetics topics. It will take their understanding of God and the Bible to a deeper, more meaningful level.
2. Be consistent: Use it in everyday conversations. Studying apologetics doesn’t have to be just a specific time set aside each day. Just like we try to work in Biblical truths in our everyday lives, we can do the same with apologetics.
One day my 6-year-old son was saying how cool it would be if he didn’t have a nose because then he could swim underwater. As silly as that was, I used that as an opportunity to explain why the nose is important and how it, along with all our other body parts, are perfectly designed for their purpose. We are exactly how God made us to be. I wanted to tie everyday things back into confirming God’s existence, God’s order, and God’s creation. My son even stopped to ask why I always do that. I told him because it’s important to understand how God created us because one day, Satan will use ideas from the world to convince him that God didn’t create. He asked me why Satan would do that. So I said it’s because Satan wants us to doubt God’s existence so that we won’t know God – and at that point HE connected the dots and said, “Oh, because he can’t be with God and so he doesn’t want us to be either.” Now my son not only can see ways to have confidence of God’s existence, but he understands that there is a world of ideas out there that are trying to convince him that’s wrong.
So we can use apologetics in our everyday things because our everyday selves are still interacting with the works of God. We are still in His amazing creation and can see evidence of Him in everything. So you can use the things around you and the things that your child is already interested in to point back to who God is. Are they interested in bugs? Then use the amazing design of different bugs to point to an Intelligent Designer. Are they a constant rule follower? Use that sense of morality to show that we are made in God’s image. Do they enjoy history? Go through the historical evidences of the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus. Take their natural interests and curiosities and show them how all aspects of our world can prove God’s truth. Our everyday selves are curious – we are naturally asking questions about the world around us, about our role in that world, and how we should interact with that world. And all of that goes perfectly with the apologetic defense of our faith... Which leads us to our last point.
3. Allow questions to be asked.
Our children are naturally curious; they will always be asking questions. It is the same little mind that asks why is the sky blue and how do trees grow that also asks us who made God and where did Satan come from. We want our children to be thinking and rational beings so it only makes sense that they will at some point ask questions of this faith that we are teaching them. That is a given. What varies is how we respond to those questions.
We can either be afraid of that and tell them to “just have faith” or “go pray on that,” or we can use apologetics to help them find answers. Let’s consider the first scenario. If your child brings you a question like, “Mommy, how do you know God exists?” and all you say is, “Well, I just believe. You need to just have faith that God is real.” What does that teach our children?
First, it says questions are not welcome here. The worst thing we can do is imply that people are not allowed to question their faith, the Bible, or God. That approach will lead them to think that they can’t question it because those questions don’t have answers. Second, it implies that this thing is believed regardless of whether there is any evidence of its truth, as though we follow Christianity simply because that is the routine we have always had. It means you are to just have faith in this religion simply because this is the routine we go about doing. And third, it makes them think that reason and critical thinking apply to everything – but NOT their faith, as if Christianity can’t withstand the scrutiny of a child’s logic. And that is not the impression we want to leave on our children. If they think the only thing to Christianity is that their parents taught it, their supposed faith will fall apart at the first skeptic they encounter.
So we must allow our children to bring us questions and most importantly, we must be prepared to give them the logical, coherent answer those questions deserve. Even though, depending on the age of your child, you may not give the same detailed answer you would give an adult, you are still teaching your children that those big questions do have answers. And you’re laying this foundation that it is ok to ask questions and those questions don’t diminish who God is.
We must create an environment where questions are welcomed. How else do we learn but by asking questions and seeking answers? It creates the perfect opportunity for deeper and more meaningful discussions and revelations. Even if you don’t know the answer already, invite the question. Say that you don’t know, but then take the time to study it and research it with your child. That will also show we are never too old to learn; we are to continue to grow in our faith and in our knowledge.
Let’s face it – we are all wanting to raise rational, discerning, thinking children. And if those are the minds we desire from our kids, then it should be no surprise when those minds eventually start asking for the reasons why they believe what they believe. We would WANT them to be discerning like that. So we can use that in training up our children in the faith – by intentionally teaching them apologetics, by consistently showing them God’s truth, and by allowing them to ask those questions. How we handle our training of their faith and its defense will frame the solidity of their faith. Because, let’s face it, we all have doubts and questions at time, and our emotions will try to lead us astray. So we want our children to be standing on solid ground with the faith of Hebrews 11:1 – being sure of what they hope for and certain of what they do not see.
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